Parenting Twins - in an Ideal World
Everyone knows how incredibly easy it is to bring up twins. First you have a remarkably straight forward pregnancy, where no one at all passes comment on how big you are or how small you are, you don’t get a team of junior doctors looking up your skirt for hours on end. This is followed by a two hour pain free labour where both twins pop out unaided, without a sniff of gas and air.
The babies, once born, take straight away to breast feeding without any problems whatsoever. They sleep for precisely four hours between feeds, being awake and looking happy for the rest of the time. They poo their pants before they get changed and would never dream of soiling in a fresh nappy two minutes after they were changed. They bring up wind without any problems and smile indulgently at you when you are tired, not wishing to disturb your precious sleep patterns. Your friends and partner all rally round leaving you plenty of time to brush your hair and clean your teeth, apply full make up and go to the gym four times a week. You never have an audience with you when you go to the loo. Baths are something that happen once a day and you can have plenty of me time.
As your twins grow older they ask you for at least five portions of fruit and veg a day and would never ever ask for anything sweet or salty or unhealthy. They positively love broccoli, spinach and all their greens. They never fight or argue, and play nicely all day long, sharing toys and asking nicely when they want a new toy. If you say no, they say that they understand and that it isn’t a problem. They would never reduce you to tears in the queue at the supermarket when everyone is looking.
They get potty trained in 24 hours flat, instinctively knowing when they need to learn to use the potty, and never ever have an accident. They never ever wet the bed, never vomit on your best jeans, and always go to bed on time. Often they ask to go to bed half an hour early, so that they can get some extra much needed sleep and give you some extra time with your partner.
When they go to school they settle in well and never have any problems with competitiveness and don’t even think about swapping shoes/hair bobbles/ coats/ names to confuse the teacher.
As the teenage years approach they by pass completely the sulky grunting argumentative stage and study hard for their exams, eat properly and come home half an hour earlier than agreed. They offer to help you with your shopping and would never upset you or slam doors. They thank you for understanding them. They never ever do anything to upset or hurt you, and you return the favour.
If this is your experience of twins, that is great. If it isn’t (which is probably the case!) you might need some information, support or advice from Twinsonline! www.twinsonline.org.uk
Twinsonline is here to support you through the tough times and laugh with you through the good times and to encourage you all the way from your twin pregnancy through to teenage and beyond.
© S. J. Cooper 2008
Share your Experiences of Parenting Twins!
If you have any experiences of parenting twins, good or bad, that you would like to share with other mums and dads of twins and more please email sarah@twinsonline.org.uk
Ps. The article above a light hearted look at what having twins might be like in an ideal world. Personally I am very glad that I have twins who are “normal” who are spirited and lively, and fun to be with.
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Page Last Updated
June 16, 2008
Disclaimer:- Twinsonline is here as a guide only - anything you do you do at your own risk
If you have a health concern please go see the relevant member of your health team (GP, Health Visitor, Midwife, Obstetrician)
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